There are a lot of tough jobs in sports.
Lugging a piping hot bin of hot dogs up and down the stands during an August day game in Arlington Texas is one of them. Tearing thousands of ticket stubs at Daytona National Speedway must leave workers with severe Carpal Tunnel Syndrome. And I don’t even want to think about the guy cleaning the bathroom at Fenway.
But without a doubt, the award for toughest job in sports goes to the event staff.
You’re enjoying the game with an Italian sausage and some popcorn from the comfort of your red plastic seat in section 151, while this guy stands facing the crowd the entire time. Don’t get me wrong, people watching can be fun, just go to Venice Beach. But I’d rather be watching Lebron hit a fade-away three than the drunk guy in row BB try to lick mustard off the side of his face.
And while their job is less than desirable, those guys are good. When’s the last time you saw a worker admiring a Peyton Manning pass? The entire world has its eyes locked on the Super Bowl winning field goal, and the woman in the yellow “event staff” jacket has her eyes locked on you.
There’s no way I could ever spend a day in their shoes. During timeouts, they’re making sure no crazy fans rush the court. I’d be trying to get a copy of the box score from press row. They make sure everyone exits the stadium peacefully. I’d be sneaking into the locker room for autographs.
Well, maybe it isn’t that bad? When Santonio Holmes made the game winning catch during the Super Bowl, they got to watch how excited all the fans were. The joy on their faces must have been priceless. On the other hand, have you ever missed a big play and had to listen to the guy next to you talk about it for the next three quarters? Miserable.
One more thought. Have you ever spent five hours outside in Green Bay, Wis., in December? They have; every week.
I used to think the event staff had the best job in the world. “They get paid to go to the games!” I’d exclaim.
How naïve.
The Bleacher Seat 